Hujan

Hari ini hujan lagi.. entah kenapa gue ngerasa hujan selalu membantu gue. Gue inget hujan pertama tahun ini turun ketika gue kehilangan sahabat gue, Nina. Gue begitu sedih, karena this is the 2nd time I lost a friend, a very good one. Hujan juga turun ketika gue berada di Pusdiklat. Waktu itu hari kedua gue ada disitu buat diklat prajab. Dihari itu pula gue nyatain cinta gue sama si Legend via sms..( I know it sounds crazy.. but it’s the time I got my strengh) dan gue tau dengan begitu gue ga punya kesempatan lagi untuk bis berada didekatnya. Gue tau… gue sangat bodoh, tapi gue ga punya cara lain, gue terlalu pengecut untuk bisa nyatain perasaan gue sama dia secara langsung, dan in the same time, gue harus memilih, Cinta atau Masa Depan. Then again, I become Wulan. I choose to b with my Future rather than chasing my dream. Naeem… that’s the name that’s gonna colored my life, though I dunno, should I tell him or not about the Legend. I’m afraid to hurt him as well as hurting myself. I neva luv somebody this much. Anyway, I heard that he was sick, he got sore throat. I run into him yesterday by accident. That morning, I saw his face was very pale, but what hurt me so was he just say hi without looking at my eyes, and passed me by. And saying hi with that look makes me wanna cry. But I hold my breath. If I could, I’d like to be invisible. I wanna follow him everywhere he goes, see what he sees, coz I’ve been wondering all the time, is he alright? Does he eat right? Does he smoke too much? Who’ll take care of him when he falls sick? And will he, by any chance, think of me ?

Grand Cempaka, 12-12-06
1119
20.30 WIBB